The bad news, and the bad news

Can't believe it's been almost 3 months since I updated this!  Let me get everyone up to speed... I'd been doing my treatments (Brentuximab) every 3 weeks, and had gone back to work (part-time) in the beginning of September.  I went back up to Roswell for my 6 month post-transplant checkup a couple of weeks ago.  They started re-vaccinating me (which sucks by the way), and did some blood work (broke my record with 23 vials!).  We were all set to continue the Brent (I'd had 6 out of 16 treatments) since I wasn't having and trouble with neuropathy, and had talked about doing a 6 month post transplant PET scan.  I was actually pushing for this because I'd had a few "twinges" in the same area of my back that had bothered me in the past.  I also made an appointment to have a bone density scan done (and more vaccinations) in December up at Roswell.  Fast forward one week... I was at work when my feet went completely numb.  It didn't last long, but I was going down a flight of stairs at the time, and almost fell.  After that they were just tingling, and that continued on an off all week.  I went to Corning for my infusion on my birthday, but we decided not to do it because I was starting to get some neuropathy.  They did more blood work (only 8 vials this time), and after talking with the nurse practitioner and telling her what was discussed when I went to Roswell, we scheduled a PET scan for this past Monday.  So Monday morning I went up to RPH for my 7am (too early, lol) appointment.  I had an appointment with my doctor to go everything yesterday afternoon.

So... here we are.  The bad news is, that there's no good news.  The other bad news, is that the transplant failed, and my cancer has returned... again.  So, now I just need to figure out what I want to do, going forward.  My doctor is recommending that I start a drug called Nivolumab... or for those of you that watch TV, it's a drug called Opdivo (yes, there's a freaking commercial for it).  It's approved to treat lung cancer patients, and they've been seeing good results with Hodgkins.  It's not a chemotherapy, it's a PD-1 inhibitor, so it's supposed to strengthen my T cells to help my immune system fight the cancer.  It would be a one hour infusion, every two weeks for an undetermined amount of time.  The only other option (unless I try to get into a clinical trial) would be an allogenic stem cell transplant (from a donor).  I would have to be damn near on my death bed to go through with one of those... so at this point it's not really an option, because I would refuse.  I told my doctor that I'd like a break from pumping harmful crap into my body, so I'm taking a month off from treatment.  In the meantime, I'll be researching Nivo, to decide if I want to do it... and I'll also be researching some more natural ways to strengthen my immune system to fight this naturally.  Starting today, I'll be making some pretty drastic changes to my diet to help my immune system get stronger, and to help my body detox.  I think it will be interesting to see what the lack of caffeine and sugar does to me.  Look out!  LOL

So yes, this whole thing sucks... but it could be much worse.  The spot is small, so I don't have to rush into anything.  I'm just trying not to be bitter about having the transplant done for nothing... it's ruined my chances to have another baby, and it didn't work.  But, there's nothing I can do about that now I guess... just have to stay positive and get ready to kick some ass.  XOXO